Well I've always wanted to keep a diary but never had the self discipline.
Friends tell me I write a good letter when I get around to it.
I can tell a good yarn.

I've lead a pretty interesting life to date and have plenty for the memoirs...but I have to wait til the rest of the family pops off.
But as I am the eldest, unless they all die in a prozac toxicity scandal....its unlikely I ll be the last one standing.

So I tentatively decided I'd start a blog about my family's year in France.I've written about 5 or 6 posts and put in a few photos. Personally I think it's ok.

So I ask my sister to have a read...no feedback...she says she's too busy with 2 small kids....I have 2 kids the same age and a single mother half the time.

So my OH comes across it (Le blog) tonight and says..
"I just don't understand why people want to do that?"
I tentatively ask " well what do you think?"
He repeats "I just don't understand why people want to do that"
Me " What do you think?"Him .............

I'm kinda mortified.I have an audience of 2 and they think its crap/not worth reading.

I wonder if Mrs Pepys thought Samuels meanderings were crap too...not comparing like...but ya know ;)

In a million years time the musings of a bored housewife might just be important...non???

IS THERE ANYONE OUT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(other than my hubby, you can eff off)

Sexist Bankers

Our banks and other institutions in the auld sod have never had an issue with putting our joint property in our joint names. Here in France I have struggled, it seems unsucessfully to have my name put on even our joint bank account.

Well it puts M et Mme John SMITH. I have explained to them numerous times, that I still have the name I was born with,
that I grew up with,
that I earned my degree and master's degree with,
that I climbed my career ladder with,
that I earned my professional reputation with
and I intend to keep it despite the best efforts of the french banking system.

There is also the fact that Mme John SMITH does not exist and never existed...she has no passport, no driving licence...rien. Despite these rantings today I go to collect my new cheque book and find it remains in the M ou Mme John SMITH. I mention again...that I have no ID and never sign myself by this name...and they explain that joint accounts are always in the husbands name I rather jovially (I think) said "liberté, EGALITÉ, fraternité are french fundamentals non? But not for wives it seems ....Grrrrrrrrrrr

16.11.08
Just wanted to update this post with my car insurance experience.
My car is registered in my name. And whilst completing the direct debit for the insurance payments, I mentioned jovially my problems with the bank...so he goes back into the file and chances my name to Mrs John SMITH.
I have to go back and deal with the bank before I have to change my name for real!!!!!!!!

Cows in World Downhill Ski Championship

Viewing Stand for Men's World Down-Hill Skiing Championship

The Summer Crowd

The actual men's piste being modified by earth-movers

Well above you can see the men's world championship downhill ski slope for Feb 09. In the top photo you can see them building the viewing stand. The current crowd will have moved to lower pastures for the world championships in Feb 2009....and I'm sure the place will look significantly trendier.

But here you have it and the native crowd in Oct 08.

Up to the left of the picture is the actually slope which is very steep and currently has 3 large bulldozers, hymacs on it reshaping the mountain.

I hope those guys are getting danger money cos it looked pretty bloody scary to me...they must have been operating at 50 degrees or more from the vertical...yikes. No wonder my homies were hanging out well away from them.

These homies are native mountain breeds of cattle called Tarine or abondance and they are really suited to mountain conditions. They spend the summer in the high pastures (alpages ) between 1500 and 2500 m and have mobile milking parlors attending to their needs.

They come down from the alpages around the 15th september called the demontagnée and hang out in the lower slopes until the weather forces them indoors for the winter.

One of their features is their eye-shadow (the cow in the picture is actually an abondance not a tarine famed for their eyeshadow...or more accurately the morning-after eyeshadow look)...dark and mysterious.

Lugging the lil'uns

"You're going where with the kids?"

So many people struggle with the idea of travelling with kids. I took my first flight when sonny boy was 9 days old and we have been on the road since.

Even son boy tries occasionally to remind me that I'm a stay-at-home mom. Its not really for me this staying-at-home lark and I think sticking rigidly to the job description is why so many mums go off the deep end...either post natal depression or getting bored and lonely.

The french moms seem to express this frustration by running off with the man next door. Anyhow I digress. This post is intended to be an ode my my mclaren featured above....it is this battered tool that has enable my adventures, it bears the scars of its journies from South Africa to Scandinavia. Its performs above its design load by carrying a tired 4 yo and 2 yo simultaneously across cobbled french streets. It dutifully folds up like an over the shoulder umbrella when said we need to climb 400 odd steps back up to where I parked the car in Old Lyon.

Without this battered buggy I might have to... uggh... "stay-at-home"

Crotchless Jean crisis

Ok...I've spent the whole summer packing up our house, renting it out and moving kith and kin to another country. I've settled the kids in school and the dog in the house and after nearly 11 months without visiting a shop, store or magasin....I am down to 1...yes ...ONE...threadbare pair of jeans.

So I had to pick up hubby at Lyon airport on Sunday...although crotchless might be “all that” in some bedrooms, it certainly not the thing in the arrivals hall.
So I thought I would take myself to the big smoke (pop circa 2 mill) a day early to shop....an activity which I loathe...hate...intensely. Particularly in France where they don't even do rubber gloves in my size, not to mind shoes. I went into a jeans store today and whispered a request for my size....rien! I not fat (although the candid shot above taken by my 2yo ex-daughter seems to suggest otherwise ;()... Ok so I have one roll when I'm relaxed and I'm big and tall. I beat all those skinny mares to the top of a mountain any day...I can run 10k no prob...justification over. I need something casual to cover my big butt...urgently. I will have a 2 yo and 4 yo and dog in tow....so where in the name of God should I go in Lyon? I'm all for personal shoppers...that's what I did the last time I went shopping and it was fantastic.

Later the following day……….

I have to say though that the shopping experience lived up to my worst nightmare. IT WAS HELL...ALL 2 hours of it.
I felt like Grandma down from Walton’s mountain...both in appearance and reaction to the big smoke. Cept grandma Walton wouldn't have a 2 yo clinging onto her leg for dear life and a 4 yo whinging and running off.
I’ve lived in a city for the last 20 plus years and only returned to rural life a month ago. Already I get what my family say about coming to the city. The noise, the rush, those young hooligans hanging around….all pretty intimidating when you get used to Waltons mountain.
With the benefit of my compass and shouting at the kids to shut up…I found the mega-mall in Lyon. I wrote my phone number on both kids arms as the risk of loss was high given that the mall was like an ant-hill of people and the kids were not supportive of my quest.
On arrival in Gap and I immediately located 2 promising jeans and approached the changing area to find a long queue...I was raging and just threw the jeans there and limped off (2yo yo attached to leg) I went to C+A and again no problem got 2 pairs of jeans...tried them on successfully and literally queued for 45 mins to pay....there must have been 150 people in the queue...I kid you not.
Both kids proceeded to have a mega-melt down bringing the experience to a close.I have a suspicion there was a special sale or even on on yesterday ...called Nuit Blanche? Anyhow my new jeans are not as comfy as ye olde Marks & Spencer ones...one pair slides down requiring attractive thumbs-in -loops hiking up on a regular basis and the others are a smidgen short....just enough to look nice and nerdy
But hey...better than crotchless right ?

I'm here so now what?

Yikes, where the uck am I ???
So this is the freaking blogosphere....wow...its ...its ....yeah.

Well I don't speak blog and don't know anyone else here....just I'll just do what I do in these circumstances and keep tawking...til someone notices.

Well I've already figured out they've no spell check in these here parts...good and bad depending whose reading. I am clinical diagnosed dyslexic for any of you bloggospherics who wanna take a shot at my spelling grammer or any or written stuff. I praise the lord I can write at ALL.

So what brought me to blogland?
Ego mainly, after that its cos I have stuff I want to talk about and no one to talk to alot of the time cept a 2 yo and a 4 yo and a dog who listens intently but the feedback is poor.

I do have a husband who would listen and feedback if he were in the same country...we're working on that.

As for friends and neighbours....its not that I' a loner...not at all...nope not me....very popular me..honest! Its just that they all speak french, and hard and all as I'm trying, we all know what its like to try to speak to someone who is not fluent....yes admit with we try to run away as discreetly as possible. There are a few linguistic angels who will persist in a conversation with us grammatical butchers....listening intently with knotted brows...but after an hour or so they all have to go and have a lie down.

Before I conclude I would like to thank my hubby's boss for coming up with the name of the blog....apparently that's why hubby is packing in his job and moving to France....
So roll up roll up and hear all about it!